An ode to Mama.

I still remember the important days. The days I wish I could forget.

Instead of it being my mothers birthday I wish it could just be Sunday.

The day she killed herself, I sure as shit wish it could just be a good ol' regular Wednesday with nothing in particular going on.

I've come to terms with the fact that big life events and holidays will never be easy. EVER.

She's still with me. Even though she's not.

I've become less self-destructive and violent over the years.

A lot of that is due to my wonderful "Other mother"



She livens up a room like it's no one's business. Most of the time, she IS the life of the party.

Not only is she my Husbands mother, but she's taken the place of mine as well.

Which, I tell you, Is no easy task. She loves me like one of her own and for that I will always be thankful and feel extremely blessed.

She cheers me on, brings me up and talks me down.

Even though she was raised with all boys, and had all sons, it's like she really GETS me. Ya know?

She gave me the most amazing husband. And 2 brothers I wouldn't trade for the world.

She supports me in all of my crazy, sporadic ventures, humors all my potentially awful ideas and even lets my bad behavior slide most of the time.

One of my best friends recently said "Erica isn't the type of girl you take home to mom"

I then added "Unless the mom is Sheila"

Seriously. Any other mother-in-law, I would have been totally screwed.

So, To Mama: A million and one Thank you's for letting, and encouraging me to be me. For loving all the fucked up and twisted parts about me, and embracing me as one of your own. Me and mine are forever in debt to you for being woman enough to step up and fill the shoes that were left vacant by choice.

You not only filled them, you busted the seems and soles on those bitches.

Even though you wear a petite size six.

It's because of you that I won't be drowning my sorrows with bourbon and nachos this weekend. Instead I'll be having margaritas and hot dogs with you, My mother-in-law, my best friend and my partner in crime.

Happy mothers day

Same cloth always.

E.